Left Field Comic

Saturday, March 6, 2010

MiSTEAKen Identity

MiSTEAKen Identity

Episode 19 of Left Field

Published Feb. 1, 2010 in the Northfield Entertainment Guide

Simply Fodder for Your Next Cocktail Party

Dreams are funny things. Some people claim to not dream at all – or at least have no recollection of them. I have very vivid dreams that punctuate my slumber. Most so bizarre, if taken literally, seem completely absurd. I’ve gotten pretty good at interpreting my dreams though. I believe they are a subconscious effort to raise our fears, hopes, (and… ahem… dreams) to a conscious level. Dreams can help us sort through the complexities of life and may even help us prepare for inevitable or probable future events. I don’t live by my dreams, but I do use them as tools to help make sense of things from time to time.

About fifteen years ago I dreamt that I won the lottery! My now ex-husband shook me awake, mistaking my screams of joy for nightmarish shrieking. I blurted out “WRITE DOWN THESE NUMBERS! XXXXXX etc…!” (Dream on, I am not revealing them). I can’t remember them exactly. And, you’re not gonna believe it, he didn’t write them down! (No, that’s not why we split up, but it was definitely a red flag). I have been trying to recall those elusive digits ever since. Every once in a while when I think I am close, I buy a lotto ticket. Hey, I can dream, can’t I?

Aided and Abetted by " Gus the Bus (technically a van) Driver".

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Cow Pie

Cow Pie

Episode 18 of Left Field

Published Jan. 1, 2010 in the Northfield Entertainment Guide

Simply Fodder for Your Next Cocktail Party

Epicurean delights indeed. Having raised and cooked for 6 kids, 2 ex-husbands and a few former boyfriends (no, not simultaneously) and their children, and innumerable guests, I’ve logged in countless stovetop hours and produced a gazillion meals. I can cook, bake, or create most anything for just about any size crowd. A flair for creativity and inventiveness enables me to prepare a decent meal out of next to nothing, if need be.

I picked up most of my chefly skills by hanging around my grandma Geraldine’s farm kitchen as a child. Wishing to make a dessert and lacking the usual ingredients, I once watched my resourceful grandma “throw together” a tasty, unique oven baked creation she called "peanut butter pie".

My personal best-in-show: The 1988 salmon soufflé for husband no. 2. It’s the first and last soufflé I have ever made. Why? Because it was p.e.r.f.e.c.t. perfect. I choose to ‘let it be’.

My “Don’t Ever Make that Again”: Well now, that’s a toss between

1. The Thanksgiving Day Massacre (a.k.a. the ‘oyster stuffing incident’) of 1992 (we lived in Virginia Beach, and 'When in Rome…') and

2. The ‘orange meringue pie experiment’ made with Tang (circa 1973). My little brother was the guinea pig for that epicurean experiment gone awry. The poor kid. Hey, I was 14 years old and Tang was the ‘food for the astronauts’! What’s your excuse?

My next mission: Operation Tastebud 2010; kitchen-test ‘cow pie’.

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Friday, March 5, 2010

Sign Language

Sign Language

Episode 17 of Left Field

Published Dec. 1, 2009 in the Northfield Entertainment Guide

Simply Fodder for Your Next Cocktail Party

This is my second winter back in Minnesota since a year and a half ‘self-appointed working sabbatical’ in San Diego. Though I enjoyed my time in southern California, I longed for a real winter. Something fell flat for me with the sameness of it all. It was like a SoCal version of the movie “Groundhog Day”: 72 degrees, sunny, same stinkin’ palm tree waving outside my window day after day… I kept checking my pulse to make sure I was still alive, and not in some sort of waiting room on the ‘other side’. The only thing missing was elevator music. The holiday’s without snow? New Year’s Eve in Bermuda shorts and flip-flops? The thrill was gone.

I love winter. Going for quiet, whispering walks on clear, moonlit nights - the snow glittering like diamond dust. A hushed sense of anticipation permeates the world while surprises quietly incubate beneath snowdrifts, awaiting a magical spring reveal. These images come to mind when I think of the Winter Walk. No more palm trees annoying the crap out of this Minnesota girl and I couldn’t be happier! I plan to hoof it to Winter Walk - see you there, or somewhere, in greater Northfield.

Special thanks to Sue and Anna Hansen for inspiring this episode of Left Field.

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W.W.C.D.?

W.W.C.D.?

What Would Cows Do?

Episode 16 of Left Field

Published Nov. 1, 2009 in the Northfield Entertainment Guide

Simply Fodder for Your Next Cocktail Party

‘Green is the new black’, ‘50 is the new 30’ (of that, I am certain)…
Is turkey the new red meat? You decide.

I’m a ‘mogetarian’ (mostly vegetarian) - a word I coined to describe my eating habits. Why? You ask... Well, I’ve been known to sneak a shrimp once in a while. I eat cheese, eggs and butter. And, I confess, about once a year I may indulge in a filet mignon (for the love of God, don’t tell Constance and Conrad!). On rare occasions I scarf down a hot dog or brat at a Twin’s Game. See what I mean?

About 4 years ago my mom was hosting the family Thanksgiving dinner. I phoned her to see what I should bring. She said, “Well, let’s see… I’m making a turkey, a pot roast, a duck that your brother shot, and a goose that your uncle shot.” I freaked out… like just how carnivorous do we need to get here?! Right? Everyone else was bringing the salad, sides, snacks, breads, and desserts.

What was left? More meat?

I brought a rubber chicken.

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Feelin' Froggy?

Feelin' Froggy

Episode 15 of Left Field

Published Oct. 1, 2009 in the Northfield Entertainment Guide

Froggy Fodder for Your Next Cocktail Party

It was the summer of 2006, while living in Northfield, that I had my first fleeting inspiration for Left Field. Driving home from a mural painting gig one night, I glanced at the sign entering town. Hmmm… Colleges, Cows and Contentment… I turned onto Division Street, and passed the Contented Cow Pub. I said to myself “Self, wouldn’t it be funny to have a comic strip about contented cows?” I made some mental notes and filed them away in the recesses of my mind. Until one winter’s eve in 2007. The sky was clear, the moon bright, sparkling soft snow blanketed Northfield. My friend, Lori, and I decided it was the perfect night for a warm bowl of chili and a frosty mug of beer at Froggy Bottom’s. An evening of joy and laughter ensued. Lori introduced me to Rob Schanilec, publisher of the Guide. I semi-jokingly asked if his magazine needed a cartoon strip. I was thrilled when he said he was interested! I unearthed my original ideas, polished them, wrote them, drew them, and BAM! Episode 1: When the Cows Come Home was published on April Fool’s Day in 2008, and the rest is recent history!

Sue Hvistendahl was one of the first fans of Left Field to send in a request. She really wanted a Froggy Bottom’s theme… so, here it is Sue! Thanks for your support, I hope it makes you chuckle.

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Tip of The Iceberg

Tip of The Iceberg

Episode 14 of Left Field

Published Sept. 1, 2009 in the Northfield Entertainment Guide

Welcome Back Fodder

By Sherri Faye ©2009

Constance is constantly scheming... she is the Lucille Ball of cows. Gotta love her entrepreneurial spirit!

After a four month creative summer sabbatical, it’s great to be back with my cows in tow…

Just before my leave of absence I had received fan mail and fun ideas from followers of Left Field. I am excited to announce that I have indeed taken their ideas under my artistic wing. Watch for more Left Field episodes that have been aided and abetted by fellow Northfieldians.

More Left Field News: I have developed Left Field merchandise featuring our lovable duo, Constance and Conrad! Coffee mugs and other items will be available in time for the holiday season, so watch for more information in future issues of the Guide!

Speaking of welcome backs! I wish to extend a special welcome home to my good friend, Lori Williams. After a year away, she is moving back to the Northfield area. Many of you remember Lori for her musical contributions to the entertainment scene in Northfield - singing and playing the sax with her band, Lore, and sharing her beautiful vocal talent at St. Olaf worship services and many other events around town. Glad you’re back, Lore, with kids in tow – just in time for The Defeat of Jesse James Days!

As always, I welcome your ideas and feedback regarding Left Field or my occasionally published Fodder column. sherri.faye@yahoo.com

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Sacred Coward

Sacred Coward

Episode 13 of Left Field

Published Apr. 1, 2009 in the Northfield Entertainment Guide

STRANGE BUT TRUE (and often rambling) FACTOIDS

Or, Simply Fodder for Your Next Cocktail Party

The term sacred cow has passed into the English language as a colloquialism that refers to an object or practice which is considered immune to criticism, or above reproach. The phrase is based on a popular understanding of the status of cows as 'sacred' in some Asian religions. This sacred status of cows is particularly important in the Hindu religion. Why is this? Because in Hinduism the understanding is that cows contain the souls of the deceased, hence their unwillingness to eat cows for fear of consuming the soul of their long gone Aunt Bessie or Grandmother Gupta. I totally get it. Though Hinduism is a predominant religion in India, it does not mean that everyone in or from India is Hindu, or is living in reverence of bovine creatures. Though, I would like to imagine that if Left Field were published in India, Constance and Conrad would become an uber-popular iconic hero and heroine in Indian culture and folklore – perhaps going so far as to give the beloved Ganesh some competition. Statues, shrines, temples and entire sutras and enchanting chants dedicated to Constance and Conrad would be seen and heard across the land. But, as usual, I digress.

Are Cows Sacred? As creator of Left Field, I suppose that I have indeed come to think so. But, it’s really an individual choice.

Are Cow’s Cowardly? Well, depending on your definition of coward, perhaps. Though, consider how brave they are. After thousands of years of humans ‘mooing’ at them, while driving by in cars, or rickshaws or whatever mode of hoofing around we humans have invented, they still insist on huddling and grazing near roadsides around the globe. It could drive them mad, but they endure somehow. I wonder… is mad cow disease (and there will be an episode about that, believe me) a tangential result of this inane, but irresistible mooing habit that we have? (I confess, I have done it.) Yet those brave, brave cows have seemed to handle it well. If I were a cow I would run screaming (in a moo-scream like fashion) to the opposite end of left field at the mere thought of one more person antagonizing me and my fellow cows with that incessant noise!

While you are out and about in downtown Northfield, enjoy a delightful dining experience at Chapati or the many eateries who provide a satisfying treat for your taste buds… who knows, you just may wind up running into the divine duo. If you do, I challenge you to try not to ‘moo’ at them…